Still More Pet Peeves, Part 1

1. Those stick-figure stickers on the rear windows of cars - usually minivans - of "Daddy," "Mommy," the kids, and the pets, all in descending height order.

2. Too much perfume. Just because you put so much on that you kill your sense of smell does not mean you need to add more. That just kills all of our senses.

3. Toilet paper and paper towels should hang over the front, not the back of the roll.

4. Littering. Duh.

5. Leaving too many lights on in the house. This is really one of my friend Mark's pet peeves, but he's pretty smart, so I guess I can learn from him.

6. Parents that let their kids cry and scream in public places. No, I'm not a parent so I don't truly know what's going on, but you could at least take your kid out of the movie theater!

7. Driving in the left lane, not just passing, especially on an open freeway.

8. Tailgaters. I'm passing already, but I'm not going to speed that much just because you're in a hurry, leadfoot.

9. Speeding up on the freeway to pass someone and then slowing down so they have to pass you. Ever heard of "cruise control?" Actually, that's what Tom's agent should have had before he went on Oprah to profess his love for Katie Holmes by jumping on the couch. Maybe I should say before went on "Oprah." Otherwise, Katie might get mad.

10. The day and week after the Super Bowl when all those jerseys of the winning team appear. If you were a real fan - like my brother Jeff the Giant's freak - you would have been wearing it during the game.